Who Am I?

Don't you worry, I wasn't going to leave this blog! I guess I just needed to take a break from everything and do nothing... literally.
If you think by the title that this is a tag, you are mistaken. It's just me needing to let out some things. I figured: what better place than my dear blog?

Today, I had the opportunity to talk with a Quebecer filmmaker who has Cambodian origins... We watched in class his latest movie, talking about identity. I won't get into details because that will just bore you.
What I wanted to share is my trouble to identify myself to a place, a culture, a society. I was born in Romania and I moved here, in Quebec, when I was 7.
The first thing, as most of you might know, is that Quebec is really different from the rest of Canada. So, should I say I'm a Canadian or a Quebecer, even if Quebec isn't a country yet? Or am I just plain Romanian, since I was born there and so where my parents?

My favorite picture from my Romania trip, in Summer 2010.

Well... It's pretty complicated. See, I haven't really been in the rest of Canada, so I can't really say that I feel attached to the country. What I certainly feel is an attachment to this province... but it seems that every time people ask me if I feel Quebecer or Canadian, they're asking me if I want Quebec to be a country.
What I like about this place is how nice people are... I have been in Ontario actually, to Ottawa. Now, I won't judge... but I wasn't feeling as welcomed and nicely received as here. In Quebec, I like the different cultures that I co-exist with everyday, the different foods I get to taste, the different languages I hear... I like the sense of freedom that Quebecers cherish so much.

A little street in the city where I was born.

I can relate to this culture. It's in me. But, the only problem is I can't deny my origins. I do come from a more conservative country. Whether I want it or not, some of this culture's values were passed on to me. The huge issue with this is that my mom, who grew up in Romania, came here and doesn't seem like she completely integrated and adapted herself. Even worse, she isn't very open-minded. The monstrous part of all this is that she isn't open to the Quebec culture! The place and culture which allowed her to have a better life, she can't accept. Isn't that the weirdest thing? Yes, when I go to Romania, I feel like a stranger, a tourist.
However, I can't say that I'm Quebecer. I just can't...

I know most of my readers are actually Quebecers, but I was wondering if anyone has ever felt that... not knowing where and to what you belong.
Thanks for actually reading this if you did. Made me feel better just to type it.
xox :) normal girly articles back soon ;)